The Sims - Nick Wayne meets The Welcome Wagon

The Sims: The Welcome Wagon

The last episode, I said, “People don’t come to your house wanting to be friends.” WRONG! Nick Wayne returned from the gym only to be greeted by The Welcome Wagon.

The Welcome Wagon involves people knocking on your door, insisting to know who you are. Apparently, this is some shit homeowners do when someone new enters the neighborhood. Us apartment-dwelling folks don’t get the same treatment.

Nick didn’t want to answer the door. Black people aren’t trustworthy of random white people showing up at the door. Hell, black people are barely trustworthy of other black people. But he also didn’t want the strangers thinking the lone black guy in the community was hostile. People talk and that’s how rumors get started. Or how cops get called.

The Welcome Wagon consisted of Frances Cotton and Johnny Zest. Frances is everyone’s grandmother. She brings a fruitcake as a present even though NO ONE wants a fruitcake as a gift. But because she’s our thoughtful and sincere grandmother, we take a few bites and pretend the fruitcake tastes great before promising to eat the rest later. That cake is definitely going in the trash.

The name “Johnny Zest” sounds like the way Jared Goff looks. While we shouldn’t judge a book by its cover or name, something about Johnny isn’t trustworthy. Nick even knows this. You can tell from the way he glares at Johnny in the main image at the top. Johnny probably has amazing parties where girls walk around in bikinis the entire time and there is no shortage of weed. But he also looks like a closet snitch who says low-key racist stuff in conversations before apologizing to “anyone who might have been offended.”

I’m also certain he gropes the women at his parties.

Thing is, guys need male friends. We need peers to bounce our life experiences off of. It’s the only way to know if what we are going through and thinking as men are normal. While women friends are just as needed, it’s nice to have friends that we can confide in without the distraction of wanting to fuck them. Men don’t always do the greatest job of opening up to one another. But put a group of them in front of a UFC fight, and over the course of nearly four hours, some barbershop-style conversation will happen.

Thus far, Johnny is the only man to step up to the plate of being Nick’s guy friend. So Nick is stuck with him. At the same time, Nick needs Johnny. Nick needs a bro to have his back, serve as a wingman, and buy drinks on his father’s credit card.

Plus, black people need white friends the same way we implore white friends to do the inverse. (Note: Or is it “reverse?” I honestly don’t know.) We can’t tell white people to expand their horizons and learn from a social group different than their own without being willing to do the same. Now, if Johnny proves to be everything his look and name suggests, Nick should ditch his ass. Till then, give Johnny a chance.

As for Frances, while we all respect the elderly, we don’t necessarily need to become friends with the elderly. Nick will be sure to say “good morning” at the top of each day and ask about the grandchildren. But there won’t be a conversation on politics or Anthony Davis going to the Lakers. Unless Frances is cool like that.

The Sims - Nick Wayne at Flare Lounge

If anything, The Welcome Wagon did prompt Nick to go to Flare Lounge and chat with other adults in the neighborhoods. And I stress “adult” because there literally wasn’t another young adult there. It’s there that he finally met someone he would look forward to seeing again.

On the next episode: Getting to know Katrina

Thanks for reading. Here are previous episodes from season one of The Sims:

E1: Getting a tech job because is that easy
E2: How to make friends without Meetup

One thought on “The Sims: The Welcome Wagon

  1. Johny Zest looks like he wants to ask Nick Wayne if he has sister so he can hook up with her. Mr. Zest prob assumes that Nick is intimidated by him and will therefore fold easily when asked to meet the sibling.

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