The Long Walk: Marching Nowhere, Hoping Anyway

I just finished watching The Long Walk, and wow, bleak doesn’t even begin to cover it. I love a good “crush my spirit and leave me staring at the wall” film as much as the next emotionally unwell cinephile, but this one? This one is mean. I have so many curse words floating around my brain right now they’re bumping into each other like pinballs.

Some movies telegraph their emotional doom early. This one does it in the first ten minutes. The premise is brutally simple: in an alternate 20th-century America, after some unnamed war and economic collapse, a military regime decides to boost national morale by… forcing 50 teenage boys to walk hundreds of miles until only one survives. The winner gets a big check and one wish granted.

Why? Great question. I have no answers and neither does the film.

You know going in: there is no version of this story that ends in anything resembling satisfaction. It’s teens walking to their deaths while trying to make jokes and friendships to keep from collapsing. It’s tender and cruel at the same time — like someone softly holding your hand while leading you directly into a meat grinder.

And yet, the movie insists this horror show gives society hope. Which brings me to the question that hijacked my brain:

Hope for who? And… how exactly?

The regime claims the Walk inspires patriotism and work ethic—the stuff that famously fixes economic depressions. Forget economic policy, currency stabilization, international trade… real nations are built on sweaty teenagers doing cardio while the government crosses its fingers!

It’s the political equivalent of your landlord raising your rent and then telling you to “hustle harder.” At least I think that’s the equivalent.

Also, I don’t fully understand economics (and this post is exposing that at a dangerous rate), but I’m 99% sure depressions don’t happen because everyone suddenly stopped being gritty enough. It’s less “you didn’t work hard” and more “the system collapsed and now everyone’s talking about how expensive cereal is.”

And patriotism? Listening to teenagers get shot because they slowed down three seconds too long doesn’t exactly make me want to salute the flag. Then again, guns do inspire patriotism in the US. So okay, fine, point retracted.

Here’s where the film’s bleakness really stings:
The boys aren’t stupid. They know exactly what they signed up for. They know most of them will die. They joke, they bond, they cling to each other like people drowning in the same dark ocean. Their hope isn’t naïve. It’s desperate.

They’d rather march toward death for a chance at escape than stand still in a world designed to suffocate them slowly.

And the ending—that final city, cheering for another dead teenager like it’s a sporting event—feels like a punch to the throat. Are they brainwashed? Are they insulated enough to pretend things are fine? Or have they also accepted that hope and blood are just national currency now?

Honestly, it doesn’t matter. Because they clap anyway.

The Walk isn’t just a contest.

It’s the country.

A pointless march with no end, no meaning beyond survival, and the vague promise that maybe if we endure enough pain, humiliation, and loss, someone will reward us at the end. One lucky person gets a wish. Everyone else gets the satisfaction of having “tried.”

It’s not meant to fix anything. It’s meant to distract us long enough to forget the people in charge have no idea what they’re doing but really hope we keep pretending they do.

Fictional military regimes fail for the same reason real ones would: they know obedience, not strategy. Sacrifice, not solutions. Survival, not progress. They can keep you alive but never help you live. So they dangle a prize and tell you suffering is patriotic. That if some of us die, the rest will eventually prosper.

And we march, because what else is there?

Stand still, and something kills you anyway. Move forward, and maybe, just maybe, it won’t be you.…Wait.
Did I just rant for two pages and then suddenly understand the movie? I think I just Long-Walked myself into enlightenment.

Kane and Lita 2004

Kane, Matt Hardy, and the Most Deranged Love Story in Wrestling History

I got into professional wrestling during the Attitude Era, that golden stretch from 1997 to 2001 when wrestling was somehow both mainstream entertainment and complete madness. Watching a YouTube video about it recently made me realize just how insane those storylines were.

And I’m not even talking about the stuff that sort of makes sense, like a guy beating up his boss every week (relatable, honestly). I’m talking about Kane: the seven-foot, mask-wearing fire survivor who debuted to avenge an act of childhood arson committed by his brother, The Undertaker. A fire that killed their parents. Naturally, they decided to handle that trauma in the most rational way possible: a wrestling match at WrestleMania.

Kane is basically the Forrest Gump of unhinged WWE plotlines. The man has been through everything. His girlfriend Tori left him for X-Pac. He got recruited as a corporate hitman. He once buried The Undertaker alive and then solemnly declared that his brother was “dead.” Oh, and Triple H once accused him of committing necrophilia. Why? Because apparently that’s how you hype a pay-per-view match. Forget titles. Let’s talk about corpses!

You’d think after all that, the character would have an expiration date. But Kane just kept going. The fact that he remained a relevant character until 2018 is unreal. Impressive, but unreal.

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I’m Not in a Rush — You’re Just Slow

I was catching the subway with my girlfriend. We got on the escalator and I noticed the left side was completely open, so I suggested we walk down instead of standing. She agreed… until about three-quarters down, when she sighed and asked why I was “in such a rush.”

My girlfriend has two modes when analyzing my movement:

  1. I’m “in a rush,” or
  2. I’m “impatient.”

If I walk on an escalator, I’m in a rush. If I walk faster than the crowd, I’m impatient. Somehow my legs have become a personality flaw.

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Weapons: Overthinking, Blame, and Bosoms

I watched Weapons a third time, this time with my girlfriend. At this point, I’m certain I know what the movie is, aside from just being awesome. It’s about how we get weaponized against each other. Whether it’s harmful ideologies, media influences, family pressures, national politics, or addiction, there’s always something that sparks us to harm others.

But Weapons isn’t a single-theme movie. It tackles many things at once. I didn’t even consider one layer until my girlfriend shared something she read before we watched it: that the film exposes the darkness hidden in middle-American suburbs and how we never really know what goes on behind closed doors.

At first, my arrogant side scoffed at that. It seemed like a stretch. But… was it? Maybe not. The film’s bigger themes sit in plain sight, but it’s not unreasonable to walk away with that interpretation. After all, nobody in town had any clue what Alex lived through daily. How could they?

So yes — my girlfriend accepts that I’m a film junkie and an overthinker. Meaning that after a movie, TV episode, or even a random YouTube clip, I’ve got a brainful of thoughts I have to unload. After Weapons, I had way too much to get out of my system.

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When Leaving Feels Like Coming Home

A couple of days before flying to Toronto to see my best friend, I decided to rent a car. The idea of driving in an unfamiliar city made me nervous, but after relying on Ubers during my 2023 visit (before my friend’s son was born), I figured a rental car could save both money and time.

As I drove around Toronto each day, I felt myself blending in. At first, I was just adapting to traffic patterns. Soon enough, I got comfortable running “side missions.” I went to the movies (I saw Weapons, in case you’re wondering). My girlfriend and I took walks around Humber Park. We wandered into stores to buy an umbrella, medicine, or food to cook at my friend’s place. Before I knew it, I felt at ease, almost like a local. When it was finally time to get an Uber to the airport, all I could think was, I don’t want to leave.

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Still Listening in 2025: Jill Scott’s “Talk to Me”

You know what irrationally annoys me? When someone listens to an old song on YouTube and drops a comment like, “Still listening in 2025.” Yeah, we can see the date. But here I am, about to do my own version of that — because I’m still listening to Jill Scott’s Talk to Me, a song from 2004 that’s been stuck in my head for two decades.

I grew up on ’90s R&B — the soulful, intimate, real stuff — and Jill Scott in the early 2000s carried that vibe forward. Her Words and Sounds albums weren’t just music; they were poetry. Talk to Me is one I’ve played countless times, partly because it’s a great song, partly because it’s a little mirror for my own relationships, and partly because it’s taught me a few things.

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Overused English Phrases My Chinese Students Can’t Quit

Daily writing prompt
What is a word you feel that too many people use?

I don’t really know what words most people overuse—mainly because the “people” in my life are mostly students. As a TEFL (Teaching English as a Foreign Language) teacher at a university in China, I’ve learned that my students have a handful of go-to phrases they rely on for speaking and writing exams:

  • “Nowadays…”
  • “With the development of [something]…”
  • “Double-edged sword”
  • “In a word…” (usually followed by many, many words)

Let’s take an example. If students are assigned an essay on the pros and cons of giving children smartphones, I can guarantee that at least a third will start with: “With the development of modern technology…”

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Alternate Universes and the Reality We Live With

Daily writing prompt
Describe your life in an alternate universe.

Most of my dreams are stupid.

Once, I had a dream where the camera panned out to a third-person view, and I watched myself swing over a creek on a long vine, as if I were watching a movie about me. In another dream, I got into a car accident and was left upside down, staring blankly at the asphalt, shattered glass all around. That one stuck with me. It didn’t feel like my mind was inventing something. It felt like I was living something.

It’s hard to explain how dreams can feel different. Sometimes, I can sense my brain actively constructing a world — like Inception. Other times, I feel like a passenger, just experiencing whatever’s in front of me. I can’t explain the mechanics, but I know the difference when it happens. I’ve convinced myself that those “passenger” dreams are glimpses into alternate universes. I don’t know when or why I started believing that, but it helps me make sense of the strange, vivid places I go when I sleep.

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