Hank McLean in Las Vegas in Fallout 2

Why I’m Not Management Material (and What Fallout Made Me Realize)

I think I know what corporations want in an employee.

A couple of years ago, I was passed up for a role as the leader of a class module I didn’t even know I was being considered for. According to a colleague, I wasn’t chosen out of the fear that I would “change the entire module” if I were put in charge.

Which is true. I absolutely would have.

I would’ve pushed for changes to make the module more student-friendly. I would’ve questioned why certain things were done the way they were. I would’ve tried to rebuild parts of it instead of maintaining what already existed.

But that’s not what management wants.

They want someone who can operate comfortably within an established framework, not someone who sees the framework as the problem. They value my hard work, logic, and ambition, but they also want loyalty, compliance, and a willingness to respect hierarchy without friction.

It’s awkward when other teachers ask why I’m not a module leader. The honest answer is that if I could sand down certain parts of my personality, I probably already would be one. I guess I’m just not module-leader material.

And honestly? I’ve learned this lesson at almost every job I’ve ever been good at.

A compliant employee is easier to work with. Many companies care more about being functional than ethical — or any other “-al” adjective we like to romanticize. That doesn’t make them villains in a cartoonish sense; it just makes them efficient.

I remember interviewing at companies that seemed more concerned with finding the “right personality” than the most capable worker. I’m sure most of us have filled out those personality questionnaires meant to determine whether we’d be a good cultural fit. Not whether we’d do good work, but whether we’d do it quietly.

That’s why my ears perked up while watching the finale of Season 2 of Fallout.

Hank McLean says that an ISTP personality is the “gold standard” for Vault-Tec employees.

For context, Vault-Tec is basically the corporation people complain about when they rant about capitalism: profit over people, function over ethics, humans treated like replaceable parts in a machine. And according to Fallout, the perfect employee, at least from management’s perspective, is an ISTP.

I had to look up what that even meant. To the best of my understanding, ISTPs are practical, logical, solutions-oriented, emotionally controlled, and independent. They’re calm under pressure. They get things done. They don’t ask too many questions.

I can absolutely see why that personality would be ideal for a massive corporation.

An ISTP can make analytical decisions without getting bogged down by emotion or moral hesitation. In an unpredictable environment like Vault-Tec’s, a person who can march forward without supervision is incredibly valuable.

But here’s where it gets unsettling.

Hank adds a wrinkle: the ideal employee shouldn’t just be productive — they should also be well-meaning, sweet, and non-threatening.

That’s the formula.

You take intrinsic productivity and pair it with passivity and a desire to be helpful. Scale that across a population, and you don’t just get obedient workers. You get a society that’s easier to control. A society that doesn’t meaningfully resist power, even when that power is clearly exploitative.

Vault-Tec’s solution is literal mind control, but the metaphor isn’t subtle. They target people who are exhausted, struggling, and desperate for stability, people willing to trade parts of themselves for comfort and certainty.

And God help me, I couldn’t stop seeing the parallels to corporate life.

How many of us would glide through our careers if we could just be more obedient? If we could stop questioning systems, stop caring about ethics, stop wanting things to be better instead of merely functional?

Control works best when people are pacified. Reduce friction. Reduce dissent. Reduce discomfort. Give people enough security to survive, but not enough agency to challenge anything.

That’s why it’s so tragic when Episode 7 reveals that the brain of Congresswoman Diane Welch, a principled, anti-corporate politician, is literally used as the power source for Vault-Tec’s mind-control devices. Her goodness, her idealism, becomes fuel for the very system she opposed.

It’s a cruel message: idealism doesn’t win in this world. At best, it gets exploited.

The longer I sit with Fallout, the more it feels like a story about an endless war between idealism and greed. Idealistic communities keep forming, and corporations keep stepping on them in the name of order, efficiency, and control.

The Long Walk: Marching Nowhere, Hoping Anyway

I just finished watching The Long Walk, and wow, bleak doesn’t even begin to cover it. I love a good “crush my spirit and leave me staring at the wall” film as much as the next emotionally unwell cinephile, but this one? This one is mean. I have so many curse words floating around my brain right now they’re bumping into each other like pinballs.

Some movies telegraph their emotional doom early. This one does it in the first ten minutes. The premise is brutally simple: in an alternate 20th-century America, after some unnamed war and economic collapse, a military regime decides to boost national morale by… forcing 50 teenage boys to walk hundreds of miles until only one survives. The winner gets a big check and one wish granted.

Why? Great question. I have no answers and neither does the film.

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Kane and Lita 2004

Kane, Matt Hardy, and the Most Deranged Love Story in Wrestling History

I got into professional wrestling during the Attitude Era, that golden stretch from 1997 to 2001 when wrestling was somehow both mainstream entertainment and complete madness. Watching a YouTube video about it recently made me realize just how insane those storylines were.

And I’m not even talking about the stuff that sort of makes sense, like a guy beating up his boss every week (relatable, honestly). I’m talking about Kane: the seven-foot, mask-wearing fire survivor who debuted to avenge an act of childhood arson committed by his brother, The Undertaker. A fire that killed their parents. Naturally, they decided to handle that trauma in the most rational way possible: a wrestling match at WrestleMania.

Kane is basically the Forrest Gump of unhinged WWE plotlines. The man has been through everything. His girlfriend Tori left him for X-Pac. He got recruited as a corporate hitman. He once buried The Undertaker alive and then solemnly declared that his brother was “dead.” Oh, and Triple H once accused him of committing necrophilia. Why? Because apparently that’s how you hype a pay-per-view match. Forget titles. Let’s talk about corpses!

You’d think after all that, the character would have an expiration date. But Kane just kept going. The fact that he remained a relevant character until 2018 is unreal. Impressive, but unreal.

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I’m Not in a Rush — You’re Just Slow

I was catching the subway with my girlfriend. We got on the escalator and I noticed the left side was completely open, so I suggested we walk down instead of standing. She agreed… until about three-quarters down, when she sighed and asked why I was “in such a rush.”

My girlfriend has two modes when analyzing my movement:

  1. I’m “in a rush,” or
  2. I’m “impatient.”

If I walk on an escalator, I’m in a rush. If I walk faster than the crowd, I’m impatient. Somehow my legs have become a personality flaw.

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Weapons: Overthinking, Blame, and Bosoms

I watched Weapons a third time, this time with my girlfriend. At this point, I’m certain I know what the movie is, aside from just being awesome. It’s about how we get weaponized against each other. Whether it’s harmful ideologies, media influences, family pressures, national politics, or addiction, there’s always something that sparks us to harm others.

But Weapons isn’t a single-theme movie. It tackles many things at once. I didn’t even consider one layer until my girlfriend shared something she read before we watched it: that the film exposes the darkness hidden in middle-American suburbs and how we never really know what goes on behind closed doors.

At first, my arrogant side scoffed at that. It seemed like a stretch. But… was it? Maybe not. The film’s bigger themes sit in plain sight, but it’s not unreasonable to walk away with that interpretation. After all, nobody in town had any clue what Alex lived through daily. How could they?

So yes — my girlfriend accepts that I’m a film junkie and an overthinker. Meaning that after a movie, TV episode, or even a random YouTube clip, I’ve got a brainful of thoughts I have to unload. After Weapons, I had way too much to get out of my system.

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When Leaving Feels Like Coming Home

A couple of days before flying to Toronto to see my best friend, I decided to rent a car. The idea of driving in an unfamiliar city made me nervous, but after relying on Ubers during my 2023 visit (before my friend’s son was born), I figured a rental car could save both money and time.

As I drove around Toronto each day, I felt myself blending in. At first, I was just adapting to traffic patterns. Soon enough, I got comfortable running “side missions.” I went to the movies (I saw Weapons, in case you’re wondering). My girlfriend and I took walks around Humber Park. We wandered into stores to buy an umbrella, medicine, or food to cook at my friend’s place. Before I knew it, I felt at ease, almost like a local. When it was finally time to get an Uber to the airport, all I could think was, I don’t want to leave.

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Still Listening in 2025: Jill Scott’s “Talk to Me”

You know what irrationally annoys me? When someone listens to an old song on YouTube and drops a comment like, “Still listening in 2025.” Yeah, we can see the date. But here I am, about to do my own version of that — because I’m still listening to Jill Scott’s Talk to Me, a song from 2004 that’s been stuck in my head for two decades.

I grew up on ’90s R&B — the soulful, intimate, real stuff — and Jill Scott in the early 2000s carried that vibe forward. Her Words and Sounds albums weren’t just music; they were poetry. Talk to Me is one I’ve played countless times, partly because it’s a great song, partly because it’s a little mirror for my own relationships, and partly because it’s taught me a few things.

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Overused English Phrases My Chinese Students Can’t Quit

Daily writing prompt
What is a word you feel that too many people use?

I don’t really know what words most people overuse—mainly because the “people” in my life are mostly students. As a TEFL (Teaching English as a Foreign Language) teacher at a university in China, I’ve learned that my students have a handful of go-to phrases they rely on for speaking and writing exams:

  • “Nowadays…”
  • “With the development of [something]…”
  • “Double-edged sword”
  • “In a word…” (usually followed by many, many words)

Let’s take an example. If students are assigned an essay on the pros and cons of giving children smartphones, I can guarantee that at least a third will start with: “With the development of modern technology…”

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